Well, you see, yesterday was a very horrendous day for me. I cried almost all day. I finally told this kid how I felt about him (yeah, I probably shouldn't be doing so, seeing that I have a boyfriend). But you have to understand that this other kid was in my life way before my present boyfriend. Anyways, I told him that I really do believe that I loved him when we were "together" and it took me way after we "broke up" to realize it. I told him I still had feelings for him, and how I really wish that we were better friends. I also told him that he was the reason I cried after my birthday party at Freckles' house. You see, I was there with Dustin, and yet I still felt something towards ... this guy. I told Dustin about that though. I guess I don't regret breaking off whatever we were (we weren't official exactly), but I regret that it ruined our friendship.
After venting to him about all my life problems and everything I felt, I then felt a new emotion that I hadn't been feeling that day... stupidity. I shouldn't have told him anything. It might make things awkward for us. Maybe not though. Supposedly we are tight and we are going to hang out. I won't be telling Dustin about this blog. I feel horrible though. Maybe I should tell him.
Any suggestions on what I should do, ay? I don't want to tell him, because I already told him about my thoughts and feelings at my birthday party, and if I tell him this, he might think I'm going to leave him or something. Which, I won't due. At least not for this other guy (My proof that I'm not going to is this: 1. he likes one of my good friends[she likes him back] 2. I don't do the whole, being with someone, breaking up, and being with them again in the future.) I think those 2 reasons are good enough. I sound extremely dumb right now and so I'm going to stop blabbering on about this whole messed up situation. please, PLEASE! Give me suggestions on whether I should tell Dust or not :/
