Oh, hey... You're still here?

I meant to leave you in high school.

Unfortunately, heartache doesn't end with high school.

So here I am, done with my freshman year of college, heartbroken. Wondering what I did wrong. Wondering what I could or should have done differently. Feeling mighty ridiculous.

But hey. At least it got me back on the ol' Boy Blog.

Cowboys and Biology

Now, I know you've all given up on this blog. We're in college....this is so beneath us...I don't have time...get over yourselves! Please keep posting, since you all just bring me such joy!
Here's a funny story to get things started.....
My friend and I were sitting in biology. Now, there's been this boy in our class that is the sweetest cowboy. My friend decided she wanted this boy to be her next kiss. Yes well, it's a topic of our conversations everyday. We've been trying to come up with plans that would lead him to asking for her number....
Then one day, it all changed.
He was sitting between us, and we were facebook chatting about our scheming plans. As my friend leaned over to watch another YouTube video (Yes I know, we totally pay close attention in biology!) the cowboy happened to look over....
"I wish he'd as for my number.....if he doesn't I'll be so depressed and kill myself!...."
Oh dear. Slight emergency here. She's really not that dramatic, I promise. However, here we are, over exaggerating, and the cowboy read it. Furthermore, he still didn't ask for her number. Double whammy. To make matters worse, when class ended we started talking about him. We were laughing at how awkward and funny the whole thing was, and lamenting about how he STILL didn't get the picture. Little did we know...he hadn't quite left the room. So, not only did he read our entire conversation, but he heard the whole thing in person.
Wow. We are just so great. Have a laugh!

A revolution.

This is the day I take my stand.

Today, from now on, I am promising myself:

-NO more guys who treat me like a sex-object. I am a human. I have a concious and basic decency. I am a female who knows when and where it is appropriate to express my sexuality. I will stand up for my morals.
-NO more guys who think they can manipulate me. I know a womanizer when I see one. You enjoy hunting the weak girls and twirl them in circles until their vision is blurry and their world is distorted. Total control is your goal and you will do next to anything to have it. I will see the signs and defend myself.
-NO more guys who are lazy and unmotivated. Let me sum this up for any guy who is reading this: SHE IS WORTH IT. I will dump any guy who more lazy than I am!
-NO more rudeness and sheer lack of manners. Would it kill you to open a door? Reply to a text message? Make eye contact? Say more than two words? No, it's not impressive when every other word coming out of your mouth is either the f-word of a reference to sex. No, it's not impressive when you slap my butt in public and yell "Man conquer woman!!" NO. It is NOT impressive when you treat me like I don't know anything and that I would be nothing without you! I will expect to be treated with respect and common curteousty.
-NO more guys who always have a condescending remark to give to me. Don't think you're smarter than me because 3/4 of the time, I have the upper hand and know what I'm doing. Your sarcastic and caustic remarks do not HELP they HURT.
-NO more guys who treat us more like a job than a relationship. Sorry sweetie, putting in so many hours will not have me putting out.
-NO more macho boys and single brain-celled male guys. When was the last time you were out of your man cave? I am sick of talking about the best protien powder. I can repreat the story of when you failed 9th grade english and can't graduate anymore. You've told me millions of times how easy all your previous ex-girlfriends were. And it is NOT cool to tell me how you haven't read a book since elementary school. Please, I will do anything for any form of intelligent converation!! I will choose a guy who has brains over muscle any day!

This is what I think:
-YES to guys, not boys.
-YES to guys who are so comfortable with themselves that they encourage me to be comfortable with myself.
-YES to guys who enrich my life and help me grow. I will date a guy who wants me to become bigger than myself, who sees potential in me and our relationship. I will date a guy who laughs in the face of uncertainty, bridles any risk presented, and will hold my hand to constantly remind me we are in this together.
-YES to guys who see me as an equal. When there is a problem, we can address both sides and be fairly represented. When feelings flair, we will let them flair but know how to deal with them. We will be adults and not adolensences. He will respect my thoughts, ideas, opinions. If I am in the wrong, he won't save this opportunity and backstab me later. He will call me out and we will not dwell on the problem, but the solution.
-YES to guys who drop their emotional luggage, don't bother testing the water, and dive in head first. He doesn't believe in being tied down by the past and is optimistic about the future.
-YES to guys who have a constant personality: they would be the same guy I was crazy for and treat me the same way as he would in front of his friends or if we were on a date.

From now on:
-I will not compromise what I want now for what I want in my future.
-I will act like I'm worth it because I am.
-I will encourage risks, grasp challenges, interpret "danger" as "adventure", and enjoy the ride.
-I will remeber that who I date is a reflection of who I am. Dating a egotistical jerk who is prone to temper tantrums? Pick yourself apart before you even think of picking them apart.
-I will respect myself. If I don't, then why would any one else?

May this be a revelation and revolution for any woman who reads this!

Hallelujah!

There has been a miracle ladies! Yes, since the terrible repetitive breakup scenarios since December I have been extreemly cynical and have kept myself sheltered from the world of men (for the most part) but it seems even someone as unlucky as me, ( ex: I got a ticket last night for going 30 around a corner...???) can scrape up a bit of good karma once in a while. We'll call him Tuck. He's the one ive had the secret crush on for months but I was always just one of the guys to him. I decided to let things run it's course and if it happens it happens, if not... nothin else is new you know? So, months go by while im watching him throw himself at specific girls and get played every time. The obvious solution would have been to just like me right? No, we all know from experience that nothing is ever that easy! Well, it just turns out that my BF happens to be his cousin... So we become the 3 amigos, the 3 musketeers, the 3 whatever youd like to call us, and even though at that point Id love a chance with him it was just too perfect as friends and I didnt want to lose that. I was completly content just being friends for once!
All I have to say is I am a firm believer in the saying "The best relationships come out of friendships" because now he is starting to notice me for the things he likes about me and not just what he sees on the outside like every other girl! And he is so adorable and such a gentlemen! Thank goodness for summer!

6 word: Yes! finally a good news blog!!

Lost In the Mazes of Men

hmmm well I check this blog everyday, so I thought I'd post something....

huh, well now that I'm graduated and summer is here, the world has changed. Suddenly I'm being asked on more dates a week than my entire year. To add to this statement, where did all the men come from? Some are coming back, some just stopping by briefly, and some leaving a trail to follow as they walk away.... Boy 1 sent me through a series of mazes. I'd get lost with his mixed signals and his lack of commitment to lead me in the right direction. As far as I could tell, he'd left me in the dust until he got bored again. So I tried to move on, thinking he'd made it clear that I needed to. That's when, shall we call him Bases?, came along. He charmed me right out of the baseball park! I thought he was the greatest guy I'd ever met! So I fell for him. Well, turns out he was an entirely different person than I thought he was. Entirely. He's the type of guy that takes advantage of a girl like me, and then makes a show out of it. What else was I supposed to do besides run away as fast as possible? Now I'm getting crap for moving around too fast.... well sorry if I didn't want to get raped today. Boys really are only after one thing, and I can relate to CC. So judge as you wish, but I'm sick of being treated like crap. I called him Bases, because he tried to make it to home plate, and I wasn't having that! To make matters worse, he's a year younger than me... I'm trying to find someone worth my time, but he seems to be MIA. That or I'm sure the good guys have all been taken. So, I'm off men for the moment. Friends are so much easier to deal with. The lack in drama is welcomed openly, and I'm finally enjoying the lack in pressure. I'm on the run girls, hoping the right guy will catch up to me.

six word: Now I remember necessity for closure.